Saturday, September 8, 2007

Bin Laden's Blather

OK, so I can admit when I'm wrong about something. Apparently Bin Laden is alive, and he is sporting a younger-looking beard in his new video, to better attract the virgins. I was pretty sure he was dead, but this video is sprinkled with enough reference to recent events that it's clearly new, like since the first week of August.

The crux of this video appears to be that he's very disappointed in the Democrats for not ending the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and he suggests that the easiest way for us to quell Al Qaeda's non-stop assault on our shores is for all of us to convert to Islam.

Hey, Osama? How' bout this, babe. You stop trying to kill us, and some of us might consider it. But if you keep trying to kill us, simply because you don't approve of our culture, we will continue to hunt you and your followers down like dogs, and we will kill you first. We will keep your group impotent, unable to attack, always hiding, and always on the run. You will remain a pathetic embarrassment in the history of Islam.

We will do this until you give up, or until you are all dead. We would prefer that you and your supporters give up, work and trade with the global community, become wealthy and self-sufficient, contribute your special goods, ideas and talents to the world marketplace, and help to protect everyone's right to worship as they please...

...but if you decide not to, that's your call - we're just going to wipe you and your followers out, that's all. Your choice.